Re: Jim Austin

You've certainly raised a great point about violence towards men and boys. However the majority of that violence is still perpetrated by other men and boys.

"itstartswithyou" does not ignore this fact and you can see that in some of the text of the campaign.

"Even though laws and social policies have changed, inequities persist generation after generation because of the messages we give children about how we value women and men. Many boys and men are taught to hide their emotions. They have been taught that feelings make them weak and feminine. But feelings are a part of being human. When we try to suppress feelings, they often re-emerge in the form of aggression and violence."
http://www.itstartswithyou.ca/about/bigger-picture/

"The social well-being of boys includes gaining the capacity to develop healthy and equal relationships with girls and boys, women and men, friends, family and colleagues alike."
http://www.itstartswithyou.ca/educators/tips/

"Many boys grow up witnessing violence in the home or directly experiencing
violence themselves. Although this leads some boys and men to refuse to use
violence themselves, it has taught others that the use of force is normal in
personal relations."
http://www.itstartswithyou.ca/about/bigger-picture/

Are just a few examples of how our campaign addresses how men are treated in society.

However, it remains our mandate to focus specifically on men's and boy's violence against women & girls.

I think this campaign is a great idea. It will teach communication skills that are not normally attributed to men, and boys, and allow them to address isues of violence, equality and diversity in a safe and equitable manner.

At the same time however, I believe this campaign is missing an important point. Sexual violence affects men and boys as well. Health Canada suggests that 1 in 6 males with be sexually assaulted or abused by the time they are 18. That's about 2.6 million males across Canada. Yet if we don't talk about it, how will boys and men know that its ok for them to tell their story, and to seek out help and support? The old notion of "If men cannot be victims, how can victims be men?" needs to change in order for every member of society to be able to enjoy their lives celebrating their diversity, and validatiing their self-worth.

Campaigns such as this, while well intended, and very supportable,inadvertantly marginalize a great many of their target population by not addressing the issue of violence against boys and men as well. We simply cannot afford to ignore the fact that boys and men can be hurt by violence just as much as women, and that as men, we can also tell our boys its ok to tell someone.

I am Anishnaabe Kwe and have only begun to understand and know our original beliefs systems. They are very clear in how we are to treat one another as women and men. I think my advice to Anishnaabe fathers would be seek out those original teachings with their sons and come to know what their ancestors had once believed so strongly in, that is women have very special gifts that must be respected which are learned through the creation stories. Seek to hear these stories, over and over again. Miigwech

Up to and until I stopped long enough to notice how I had been shaped by my own personal history, and experience, I could not move beyond it to create something new. Choosing to "redefine" myself from this present moment, by being mindfull about what is available to me now, rather than how I've been shaped, and the effect of that shaping on my outlook, my perceptions, and therefore, my actions, was the only hope for creating something new, and shaping the future of my children in a way that is meaningful to me.

My father was a great man. He treated my mother as his equal and consistently supported her in her all of her endeavours. When she started a new business, he provided all of the seed funding to her and helped her get it off the ground. When she was working hard at the business, he'd take care of us kids on top of doing his regular full time job. He kept a cool head and even when my mom divorced him and took everything, he was always kind and always respected her decisions. After their divorce, even though he was impoverished and my mom did get everything, he faithfully paid his child support, and never said a bad word about her to us. My dad was truly a great man and a role model.